Tuesday, July 5, 2011

Week 19, Day 5 - Ultrasound & Big Family Musings...

So....let me just say, it's interesting having lots of kids. It's not like they're all these obedient little clones of you that dutifully do what you say and willingly jump to help when there is something overwhelming for Mom. AND it's not like, when you do something fun & nice for them (that takes more effort than normal on your pregnant part) they jump up & down with joy and jubilantly have a WONDERFUL time with no bickering or complaining that, "this is soooo boring....!"

That's been my day, hee hee.

(And by the way, ultrasound appt is in 1 hour - stay tuned for results, hopefully I'll have some news for you: boy or girl? Right now we have 4 girls and 3 boys so this could be the one that makes them "even steven" or the one that makes the girls WAY outnumber the boys =)

Today I woke up determined to be raw, once again, as is my usual mantra each & every day! I didn't, however, want to go running at. all. But probably part of that was cuz yesterday was a crazy day of course, being 4th of July and all. Basically I ran around like an energizer bunny in the morning cleaning the house (I absolutely cannot STAND coming home to a messy house, it stresses me out so, so much and I try to make sure that never happens if I can possibly help it) and then gave the kids an early lunch and early naptime, since we had to be out at Macleay by 2pm. James had a sleepover with a couple of boys so I had 8 lunches to make - no small feat on a small counter with little ones wanting to sit and watch on said counter! =)

The 2pm start time didn't really happen, we made it out there by 3:45 - in time to hop in the pool, only to realize that Rachel needed a suit so off she & I went to the store, came back, only to realize once again that it was time to get OUT of the pool and eat. Then SERIOUS potluck craziness with all the kids crying and wanting this or that, trying to balance flimsy paper plates double and triple in my hands while shooing the kids along in the line. Whew! At one point I was like aack! I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO!
Late night with fireworks, both little ones 3 & 1 were scared and shaking and crying a bit, but still enjoyed the "pop pops" - DH & I held them tight in their blankies and Jack3 finally figured out a genius idea - put his blanket over his head and watch the fireworks THROUGH the flimsy worn-down material. LOL.

So anyway, got to sleep probably around midnight - and just did not have the umph to go running. I haven't run in 3 days now...I can feel my determination to continue running slipping away from me, walking instead just sounds soooooo nice and peaceful in the early morning. I don't know, we'll see - maybe I'll just cut it down to running 3 miles. Running is still completely comfortable for me, it's just not EASY I guess, it takes effort like ANY workout does, especially hills. It's not "pleasant" like being cozy in your bed - walking feels alot closer to that, to me.

The house was still pretty clean this morning from us being gone all day yesterday so that was so nice!!! I tidied up in the morning knowing that the day promised to be HOT - 87 - and then got kind of ansy and decided that we were going to DO something. So far this week we've been getting an email around 1pm if the pool at Macleay is open today...but couldn't wait that long.

So we trooped out to the car and went to the school for lunch at 11:45, ham & cheese w/pretzels, baby carrots, orange wedges, and chocolate or plain milk. The school we are going to, has a library day on Tuesdays where each child can get 5 books each. YES that makes me sooo nervous, my kids are not very good with books but mostly, somehow, we seem to be really adept at losing them, even in our small house! I hope it works out OK, they sure had fun picking them out.

After that we went to Roth's to grab a few things for the crockpot roast dinner I am making (our kitchen floor is smack in the middle of being replaced so that means NO dishwasher and NO oven = crockpot & bread machine dinners, fun and I have to get creative cuz I can't warm anything up - we don't have a microwave either!) and of course, free cookies for the kids. I love that about Roth's, our local grocery store - their cookies are nice sized and yummy, almost homemade or even bigger than homemade, and they can each get a free one up to age 12.

Back home while I kept the engine running and they looked at their books, I ran in the house and dumped the contents of what I got (onion soup mix & cream of mushroom soup) at the store in the crockpot, along with SUPER quickly peeling & chopping 8 potatoes, carrots, and an onion. Can of tomato soup, some water, a good shake of a few spices, and then I grabbed 6 towels and the other stuff we needed for water play - swim diapers, 4 swimsuits, sunblock.

We went to a waterpark we'd only heard about, here in town - over by Fred Meyer in Keizer. From the road you couldn't see ANY water, but we drove in to check it out - and they had this really cute little fountain playground with mostly kids ages 1-10 or so playing. I thought, aaaaw so fun, let's have a fun day!

Ha. Yeah....right.

As SOON as we pulled up, they started complaining. Oh, my...it was a DUMB playground...it was too hot...they didn't want to be here...hmmm. But of course as we were pulling IN to the park and I told them if there wasn't water then we would just play anyway, they complained about that. LOL! Isn't that a part of our nature as well? When we're having a bad day, everything is bad no matter what!

I finally got the 4 younger ones' swimsuits on & swim diapers on those that needed it, and brought everyone over to the water area, put down some towels, plopped down, and told them - okay, go play! Didn't work, they all just stood/sat around me complaining that it was too hot, there were too many kids, etc. Finally a few of them ventured into the little streams of water but it was like they were allergic to it or something. Fuss fuss fuss, toooooo cold, Mom! Grace7 had left us and gone over to the OTHER playground around the corner where I couldn't see her, so I asked Isaac8 to please go tell her to come back to me right now, that was NOT okay.

She refused to come. But I couldn't very well leave all the little ones (Rachel12 who would normally be able to watch them, was very grumpily across the field playing on her ripstick) just to go get her. So there I was sitting there in the boiling hot sun with hot kids around me, refusing to go get wet because it was "too cold" in the water...rrr.

I was pretty much on the verge of flipping out at them - I was tired and hot TOO but wanted to make it good for them, so we were on an adventure, for crying out loud! I just said okay, fine guys, we are LEAVING. I grabbed our stuff and gathered the kids and just put them all in the car - amid protests that they wanted to go play on the OTHER playground. I was getting mad at that point and said nope! It's way too hot to just play in the hot sun like that, and we are NOT doing this again. I'm thankful I was able to explain to them in a calm voice.

But it did a number on me, I was so frustrated - it's not like I have tons of energy, you know? I had eaten raw up until then, a chocolate shake & also grapes - but I was like I WANT TO EAT SOMETHING!!! Like emotionally I needed something good to eat to counterract this kind of sucky day. But I knew that I set the tone, you know?

So we all went to Arby's drive through and I got them each $1 curly fries, and myself a chicken BLT. I know, so bad! CHICKEN, even! But it was good and hit the spot and calmed me down. =)

After THAT, I was like - hey, it's 2:30 and my appointment is at 4:15...how fun would it be to swing into Blockbuster and rent some movies for them to watch while the littles are napping and I'm at my appointment? To make it easier for Rachel - they were all so grumpy and I was hesitant to just up & leave them in her care...they needed more TLC than she is able to give them.

So we trouped in there (first taking a few minutes to put on various clothing over swimsuits & shoes - and of course Jack informed me that he pooped in his swim diaper, lovely) and I had the girls (Grace7 & Marie5) pick out one movie, and the boys (James10 and Isaac9) pick out one, and Rachel12 pick out one. Of course they all wanted one and I was tempted since it's only $.99 ea, but then I remembered that it's only for one night, and that would mean like, nonstop movies going until tomorrow night if we were going to get through them all!

So here I sit, typing away, as the movie has now started and the two littles are napping. Turns out the Macleay pool IS open today until 7pm so IF my appointment doesn't run too late, I plan to grab a quick dinner (I wonder if it's possible to eat a pot roast "super quick??" I'm tempted to just get McDonalds...$1.25 per hamburger happy meal every Tuesday after 4pm...hmmm...) and go out there. Maybe DH will meet us out there after work.

Tiring day, I'm ready for a nap! I missed my cutoff time for putting bread in the machine so I guess we'll just have plain old store bought potato bread with jam - but at least it's homemade strawberry jam; it's pretty yummy.

Tomorrow I have an emergency dentist appointment at 10am for a tooth that cracked on Sunday - it is a root canal tooth that never got the cap on it and it split right down the middle and HURTS. I hate dentist stuff, I never have time to go - and it always costs so much money! The root canal cost me $600+ if I remember right.

I have a feeling this week's weigh-in is going to be up, more than normal. I've been losing my "umph" for the whole working out and being healthy thing. That always happens when my "goal" that I'm working towards, this time being family week and days on end at the pool, approaches. It's like once I'm there, I don't really care as much anymore.

Hopefully I can go to bed early tonight and get up early tomorrow for a nice run - probably just 3-4 miles though. I'm realizing about myself, that some of my goal to run 15 miles per week is a matter of pride - it's honor that I want from other people. Like, wow, you really run THAT much and you're PREGNANT?!! But yesterday at the picnic I felt like I got a renewed vision for what is really, so important in life.

I don't want to be seen/known as the cute little pregnant Mom of 7 kids, wow, she looks great. That is such an earthly and carnal goal and honestly does NOT bring any happiness!!! I want to be the Mom of 7 who CLEARLY has a life with God because of what radiates from my spirit - no matter how I look. In the end, that is what matters so completely and totally in this life, both for myself and for the saving of those around me (especially my children).

I've been noticing that come 8pm I am practically spent and don't have any energy to pray with the children properly or do anything extra. And it's because of my early morning hours taken up running. So if I can get up at 7am (instead ofr 5:30-6) and run for just 45 minutes instead of 60-80 minutes, then maybe I'll be more even and stable AND can stay up a bit later to be with DH or Rachel and just overall, be there for my kids.

Wow, super long post! And now I better run. =)

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